Living our 45th day of social distancing here! what about you?
The pandemic emergency is a trying experience, we all know that. The lockdown and social distancing can cause different levels of stress at home, we need to adapt, cede, reorganize and re-significate our spaces, ocupation and schedules. All of which generates multiple sources of stress for every member of the family and can end up being very demotivating.
When the lockdown started in Switzerland I was determined to make everything work, I had a plan, a schedule and I was highly motivated to keep everything going on while we #stayhome. Then Easter came and School Springbreak started and my motivation VANISHED, literally. What happened? Why? How do I regain that motivation? If anything like this happened to you, then you might want to read what follows, because I  have some tips and reflections for you on how to keep or regain a good level of motivation during the Coronavirus pandemic.


I'm not a therapist or physician and I don't intend to give mental health advice. If you are suffering mentally right now because of this whole lockdown situation, the only advice I could ever give you is to seek for professional help. 


There seem to be four possible cases: people who started the quarantine totally demotivated, but slowly found a way to go make it; those who started with high motivation and a good predisposition to go through it but at some the motivation slowly declined, those who cyclically alternated between states of motivation and demotivation. People who never lost hope and motivation. People who never found motivation and went down the slope. Do you find yourself in any of these groups?

Whichever group you find yourself in, there are a few things you may want to make sure you do, or make sure you don't do!

Uncertainty, Fear, Boredom and Burnout are your enemies during lockdown

Basically, there are four main sources of demotivation and stress:

  • Uncertainty
  • Fear
  • Boredom
  • Burnout


You may notice that whatever the cause of what is stressing you out or demotivating you now, can be cased under any of these four categories.

Uncertainty reigns. There are so many things we don't know, even the greatest specialists still don't have answers. Information is sometimes confusing and brings more uncertainty right now. The economic situation is also uncertain, people are losing their jobs. So uncertainty is definitely a big bad guy right now, and quite impossible to get rid of.

Uncertainty can most frequently bring fear. Of course, we fear what we ignore! But we also fear to get infected, or to pass the infection to our loved ones. We fear so many things right now! Guess what, that's totally normal. But we can ease the fear down too, we are capable of it!

I've noticed a lot of people right now are living in either of these extremes: Boredom or burnout! Both are terrible situations which cause very high levels of stress and demotivation.

It all looks pretty bad put like that! So what do you do?

Don't let uncertainty drive you. Control what you can control and try to put what you cannot control out of your radar. Stop wondering about things nobody has the answer for. It is pointless and it is not worthy.



Tips to battle against Stress and demotivation

There are some simple things you can do right now to ease your stress and find motivation again.



  • 1. Give structure to your day!

I'm pretty convinced that ROUTINE is PROTECTIVE. It may sound tempting to sleep in and stay all day in your PJ's, but let me tell you doing that 45 days in a row is not a good thing if you want to keep motivated. Besides, children need rituals and time frames to feel reassured and avoid stress and chaos!
Try to keep a bedtime and waketime and a certain structure, in form of rules, for instance: "everybody should be dressed for breakfast (or lunch), or "we workout in the morning", you get the point, right? I have an upcoming post with a suggestion of day timetable for the family so that everybody finds a purpose and a space during this lockdown. Also, slightly changing the structure during the weekends (no homework, or PJ's allowed on Sundays, etc) make weekends standout from the rest of the days.

children need rituals and time frames to feel reassured and avoid stress and chaos! 




  • 2. Plan your day as accurately as possible

Planning is such an important thing for me and when I haven't done it, I failed miserably. I currently have three planners: One "catch all", one for "family" where I keep organized for weekly meals, groceries, household tasks, children homeschool activities, video-calls, fun plans (we had a pyjama party on Saturday!). Also a third planner for my blog where I write schedules, ideas, social media tracking, etc. Let me tell you being a mom during this pandemic (would that be a "pandemic-mom"?) without a planner is the highway to disaster and stress! Write it down, give it a time slot, and asing the task to a member of the family. Planners save mom's mental health!

  • 3. Cut down the info about COVID-19
Media is focused on Coronavirus 24/7 right now and a lot of that information is misleading or plainly false! Overinformating yourself will overwhelm you and possibly be a huge source of fear, confusion, uncertainty. Definitely demotivating and stressful! Don't stay connected all the time. Set one hour per day to get information, you get the essential and that's more than enough.

  • 4.Focus on your strengths
Doing what you do best right now it is a good idea to keep your self-esteem high and get personal satisfaction. Feeling good and feeling productive is a great way to keep motivation high. You've overcome plenty of hard moments in your life. You've done it before, you'll do it this time.

  • 5. Don't push yourself too much/ Be indulgent with yourself
It is not the best moment to set very difficult new goals, the entire world is shaken. Let the storm pass and then you'll take care of your goals. Try to be patient and put your focus on something else.
Don't push your kids too much for school, the minimum they can do is alright. They'll catch up later. 
You are a mom like me and suddenly you find yourself having to be the teacher, the entertainer, the cook, the mediator, the fitness instructor, the mom and ALSO work from home? Don't push yourself too hard or you'll burnout. Be more indulgent, lessen your standards for a while and be more relaxed about certain things, will not make you a bad mom. Just a healthy mom. We are human after all!

Don't push yourself too hard or you'll burnout. Be more indulgent, lessen your standards for a while and be more relaxed about certain things, will not make you a bad mom. Just a healthy mom. We are only human after all!


  • 6. Workout or simply MOVE
You know, I know, everybody knows that staying at home in 2020 is NOT an excuse for not doing some kind of physical exercise! It won't be the same as your usual routine, of course not, but exercising or working out has multiple benefits for the body and the mind, it would be such a pitty not to! It keeps your happy hormones high, it helps you release the tension, it keeps your body healthy and fit and it is an excellent option against boredom. What's not to love!

It keeps your happy hormones high, it helps you release the tension, it keeps your body healthy and fit and it is an excellent option against boredom. What's not to love!


  • 7. Keep social contact virtually
We're staying home, but that doesn't mean we are isolated. Keeping regular contact virtually, on video calls, on social media, with your loved ones is a great thing to keep the morel high, stay connected and help one another staying motivated!

  • 8. Focus on your feelings and talk about your feelings
Ignoring your feelings right now is not the best idea. The situation can make us feel bad and if we do not address those feelings at once, they cumulate and drawn us.
If you have children, you must also pay attention to their feelings and encourage them to talk them out. If you think the situation is beyond your capabilities, please contact a mental health professional!

  • 9. Stay away of  scaremongers
On the TV, on social media, by text message, or even at home, there are so many people right now who are only generating false news and seeming panic. Stay away from those!

  • 10. Stay positive
I know it is easier to say than to do! But if you can't actively have positive thoughts about the pandemic, at least DON'T have any! Try to focus on other things! Fill your days with small tasks, especially manual tasks. When you do manual jobs (from baking cookies to your DIY walk-in closet project) your mind is focused on what your hands are doing and if your mind is not thinking negative thoughts, that is good news!!

When you do manual jobs (from baking cookies to your DIY walk-in closet project) your mind is focused on what your hands are doing and if your mind is not thinking negative thoughts, that is good news!!



  • 11. Stop overthinking
Again, our mind can be our worst enemy. Avoid overthinking. The whole pandemic is overwhelming, we don't have the answer, specialist don't have the answer, simply stop. All the tips above mentioned will help you to stop overthinking. I am a natural overthinker, but I've been doing pretty well during this lockdown (with a few low days here and there) not overthinking, thanks to all the tips I already told you.

  • 12. Do some relaxing excercises (or meditate)
I don't meditate. That's the truth. But I have friends who do and I know so many people do it and find it great! So maybe that's the thing you are needing! Why not trying? There are many youtubers specialised in meditation that you can find through google. Other than that, there are different methods to relax, I know a self relaxing massage technique that is very efficient (you can find it here)

  • 13. Don't forget this is temporary
This must never slip your mind. It is not forever! Somethings may change forever, like certain hygiene rules (hey! we must at least learn a lesson from all this!) but we will be back to run in the fields, hug our loved ones, travel, swim in the sea, it is just a question of TIME.

  • 14. Avoid conflict
Things at home can get very tense. Conflicts with your significant other, or with your kids. Do you have teenagers at home? So at one point there will be conflict! It is only natural and we are human beings. Too many human beings in one small space. Some tips might help to limit those conflicts:
- each member of the family has a definite space
- when there is tension everyone is able to retire to a different space.
- talking about what bothers us or upsets us!
- when possible, go out take a walk and unwind
- be more indulgent than you'd normally be with yourself and with your family
- Seek professional help if you need it. 
                       
  • 15.  Stay busy to Avoid boredom
I think this point is THE MOST addressed issue on the internet. What to do when you feel bored during quarantine. The internet is flooded with ideas for adults and for children to keep you busy, so I want go on and on on this matter. What do we do at home against boredom? We have some fixed task and also a daily list of tasks that the children vote for. We also think of some "special event" to do on the weekend (PJ party, special meal, plan a walk, etc) to have something to look after to. Also, the whole list of things mentioned above don't give us time to feel bored.


Bottom Line

This post was much longer than I expected or plan, but it seems I really had a lot to say about that! Well, I hope you find this article somewhat helpful, these are hard times for everyone I just wanted to share my thoughts and personal experience hoping someone could relate to it and find it useful.
Stay safe!

Love,
Nati